so tamad

and so bored to work... kahit na i havent started yet. ung feeling na parang you're not awake yet or na your mind is a thousand light years away from where you are right now... parang half-alive... half-alien... ahehe.
basta i am sooo not in the mood to do anything. parang i just want to bum around... and the thing is... that's okay. kasi i dont have anything urgent to finish...
procrastinate.
procrastinate.
procrastinate.
my favorite word.

ako ay natutulala.

belated happy bday, Jesus!

i miss being a kid during the holidays...
ung you make kulit to everyone else in the kitchen preparing the meals...
ung you give gifts to your classmates and friends out of your hard-earned savings (well, for me, it's a week's worth of stepping on my daddy's back and for running to the bakery to buy stuff and keeping the change)...
ung di ka makatulog the night before kasi you keep thinking about Santa and his gifts for you...
ung you prepare to act shy but astound everyone else with your talent when you sing for your relatives before Noche Buena...
ung you eat eat eat and think, wow, this is the best Christmas ever...
ung you open your gifts and shout kasi tuwang tuwa ka sa gifts mo kahit mababaw lang ung gamit nya...
ung you go caroling at other people's houses, sing thank you thank you so loudly when they give you something, and wish them ill when they dont (and sing 'ambabarat ninyo' even louder)...
ung you share your candies with the sampaguita girl on the street...
ung you look up at the sky and see the stars plus the fireworks pa... tapos you shout pa...
ung you pray hard to God...
ung you make a list of new year's resolutions way ahead of everyone else... tapos when you hear theirs, you edit yours pa...
ung feeling lang... ung feeling na kid ka and it's the holidays and its so fun fun fun...

pero ok lang... i had a great time this year...
ngayon kasi, i can say na, kahit na namulubi ako, i was able to treat everyone else to a Christmas they wont forget... i know that money cant buy real happiness... but giving it away sure made me happy... :D
not literally giving it away noh! i just treated everyone else to good food, some shopping for their wish lists, watch movies so they can forget their not-so-happy lives even for just 2 hours... i bought stuff for myself also... hehe. a book, 2 bags, a magazine, a pair of earrings and sunglasses.
over all. i am happy :D because after the weekend, when i lay in my bed last night before i slept, all i could see were the smiling faces of my relatives and inaanaks, and their noisy laughter.
in the end. this is what matters:

we long for someone (or for others)
NOT BECAUSE WE WANT TO BE HAPPY
but we long for someone (or for them)
because we want to share our happiness
with that special person (or those special people)
for the rest of our lives...

i am unhappy

i dont know if that admission will make things better, or am i just projecting my life as something worse than it really is?
i know that there are a lot of things i have to be happy for, and i am, most of the time... but then i never know if that is just becuase i normally do have a happy and positive outlook in life...
basta.
right this moment.
i feel unhappy...
and it's going to be christmas tomorrow...
i am just simply lonely and unhappy... even if i know that i shouldn't really be...
maybe it's because... i never seem to really get what i wish for... which are simple things really...
sigh.
ewan.
im just unhappy...
i hope i snap out of this soon.

stole this from julie... sweet. wish ko lang...

When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom. This was the scene of ten years ago. The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid, I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school. Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes. Dew came into my life. It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her. Dew said, "You are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, "Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls." Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn't help doing so. I moved Dew's hands aside and said," You go to select some furniture, O.K.? I've got something to do in the company." Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me. However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.One day I said to her in a slight joking way, "suppose we divorce, what will you do?" She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that 'divorce' was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious. When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes. Once again, Dew said to me, "He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together." I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more. When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. "I've got something to tell you," I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. "I want to divorce." I raised a serious topic calmly. She didn't seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, "why?". "I'm serious." I avoided her question. This so-called answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, "you are not a man!". At that night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew. With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to>see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer. A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again. She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month's time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken. She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, "He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?" This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, "I remember". "You carried me in your arms", she continued, "so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning." I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage with a romantic form. I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. "No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce," she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, "daddy is holding mummy in his arms." His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, "Let us start from today, don't tell our son." I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office. On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face. On the third day, she whispered to me, "The outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there." On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vaguer. On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this. I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, "It seems not difficult to carry you now." She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, "All my dresses have grown fatter." I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head. Our son came in at the moment. "Dad, it's time to carry mum out." He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, "Actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old." I held her tightly and said, "Both you and I didn't notice that our life was lack of such intimacy." I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, "Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious." She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. "You got no fever." She said. I moved her hand off my head. "Sorry, Dew," I said, "I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you." Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the office. When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, "I'll carry you out every morning until we are old"

i was on leave the past two days, and i didnt even get to rest. hay nako, christmas shopping rush. pero ok lang, i got a lot of good stuff naman to give away kaya im happy. just harassed though. and sooo in need of love. bwahahaha... anyway, there are only about 3 of us in the team today... and there are about 15 companies in the queue. sheeeshhh. tapos may s&p project pa to do. ive got about 4 on my to-do list for today. hayyy. wish ko lang this is still a happy day. o sha. gotta go get busy...

sunny gave me a gift!

this is what's written:

THANKSGIVING
everytime these days come into view
let a moment of gratitude ensue
if hours seem long and joys seem few
blessings of life below are supplied for you


rainbows after rainy days
talents we can share with others
jobs that keep us busy and help us grow in character
angels
new discoveries that make life better
rest at the end of a long day
starry nights
people who've taught us well about good things
clean water
animals that delight us
whatever heals us
songs that lift out spirits
delicious food
sports
hugs
mountains to climb (literally and figuratively)
children's laughter
trees to shade us
love
new places to explore
second chances
and the mistakes we have learned from them
rainbows after rainy days
new skills to learn
funny jokes
extra time
love
answered prayers
true friendships
grace, strength and courage to face any trouble
the ability to smile.

im sorry...
i cant be with someone... who'd rather leave me alone... than accompany me in my times of sadness and confusion.
i cant be with someone... who will love me... and then leave me... not anymore.
please.

awww. engaged na sila... 

er, hagrid? hermione pala! 

our xmas party was great!
i won a christmas ham! hahaha. atsaka P2000 sana kaya lang naforfeit cause i had to get my things from the hotel room. grrr... pero ok lang. at least it was really fun.

kudos to kate, winner of female star of the night... is that you hagrid? hahaha...

congrats to sunny... she got engaged... awwww... (inggit)

the desserts were the best! haha, got to taste a few of each and took home some brownies, hehe.

anyway, ill be on leave tomorrow and on wednesday. will be doing some shopping! woohooo!!! i hope it doesnt hurt me much. :D

anyway...
add to my christmas list:
Bath and Body Works Cool Citrus Basil body spray... the problem is where to find it! :(
pero okay lang... im looking for a new scent.
New Year, new scent! haha.

and i want to be in looooovvvveee... yung floating in the clouds, reaching for the stars, giddy giddyap in love. haha.
but i do love someone... and that someone loves me...
but well... i just want to be soooo in love... yeah, that's my christmas wish... i want that kilig feeling to stay. :D

nga pala, have you heard of the credibles? :D click click!

maybe
it
was
never
written
in
the
stars
that
we
would
be
happy
together.

that part of our lives has passed.
that chapter has come to its end, long before we even realized it.

puro donuts ang laman ng tiyan ko

ang saya saya ng araw na ito.
wala lang.
ang gulo kasi ng mga tao sa office.
tapos puro gifts :D
tapos puro pakain (naka-apat na donuts na ata ako: cello's at gonuts...)
tapos bukas christmas party na...

ako si alwina, with multi-colored feathers sa pakpak... sigh... ok na un.

basta, sana manalo ako ng dell computer sa raffle.

ok naman ang work. di na napapansin ang pressure sa sobrang saya.
masaya lang.
basta.

andaming holidays!!!
yesss... madami ding holiday payssss...

i loooovveee holidays...

sa sunday mara and i will go shoppinggggg!!!
mommy will be out of town and we will stay late out and go shopppiiinnngggg!!!

wheeeeeee!!!

still here...
going home na... the most boring part of the day is commuting. it really really sucks.

*** People from the US are here in the office to train us for the next proxy season... we'll be handling levels 2 and 3 na ren. wow. more work for us. more stuff to confuse us. just when i thought i'd be able to handle the coming season so well, enough to achieve a 99 percent accuracy, well, goodbye 99%...
in fairness, level 3 is all about stock purchase plans, which i've become familiar with in my UK Compensation stint.
haha, alam ko di nyo gets, but this just means more work for me, and hopefully, i wont suck at it.

*** i was late this morning. panu ba naman, there are loads of people in arlington kanina, which is just near our village. are they really there to pay respects to "Da King" or are they just vultures closing in on their prey? sometimes, events like these are reduced to "artista-ogling"... sheeessshhh... we really love seeing these showbiz people in person, siguro kasi we think that we're a whole lot more important when we have the "honor" of gazing at them. ako, im limiting the showbiz people into a very small category that I am worth scoping for. shempre, i have my standards. haha.

*** Jimmo is coming home from Singapore on the 1st of January! astig, im going to make pakwento of how it is there and how he's been ever since we held hands and sang love songs back in grade three!!! hahaha! childhood sweetheart chapter 3. hahaha, i bet pareho pa ren kaming pandakekok. i know i still am...

*** im doing good, very well in fact, in my anti-dependency campaign. im busying myself with a lot of stuff and i think i can keep that up until the proxy season is over which will last until May i think. nice...

*** i dont have christmas gifts yet... oh no!!!

i think i have this horrible sickness... i just dont know what it is. for a long time now, ive been experiencing aches and pains, on my neck and shoulder, my right elbow, my right pointer finger (it hurts to flex it), that space between the left big toe and the toe beside it. i get cold easily. when i wake up, its such a pain because everything seems to hurt... i get bruises also that i cant explain. i hope its nothing serious, but damn, it feels like hell every morning. and the rest of the day im so squeamish... my eyes hurt too. sheeesshhh...

anyway, other than that, im pretty fine.
still in that to-love-or-not-to-love-really stage. i think by january i can make a wiser decision.

oh, acil pre-c updates!
it was soooo fun! i missed that rush of preparing for an event. i miss being responsible for something big. i miss ACIL. huhu. Kate's video almost brought tears to my eyes. hehe. a shame that i wont be able to go to area this saturday because of the ofc xmas party (which hopefully will bring the same rush as the pre-c), but maybe next year.
it was good to see all my friends also.
my batchmates (its good to hug people again), sheila (the sister bonding hasnt gone away thank God), nino (dr. love are u there?), and meeting new people also. nakakatuwa the old ones, its really nice to belong into something that spans decades.
one thing that i reeaalllyyy missed?
CAROLING. sooobrrraaa... i miss singing. i miss riding in the ACIL bus bonding with people. i miss dressing up for it. i miss visiting nice houses and eating lots of food. i miss leading other people and lifting their spirits up so that they can sing well. I MISS CAROLING. may mga caroling groups ba jan na i can join? sigh.

anyway, i know what to give my mom for christmas... a credit card! haha! hope she doesnt max it out nga lang or im dead. pero ok den lang. i hope she'll be happy with it.
sa sister ko, she asks a lot kasi e. kaya up to now i still have no idea.
i dont know who else to give gifts to. actually madami, pero i dont know if i have time pa. hmmm...
wait sige that's it for now. i have to, ummm... watch something pa. hehe.

before i go off to national bookstore with the boys...

currently cleaning out my Outlook email, for lack of something to do, hehe. i wanted to do something productive, rather than simply watching CSI again.
am posting stuff that's really really nice and worth posting. :D

"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!"

No one falls in love by choice, it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance, it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance, it is by CHOICE.

> As I've Matured...
>
> I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is
> stalk them and hope they panic and give in...
>
> I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.
>
> I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just
> jackasses.
>
> I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes
> suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
>
> I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly
> distributed.
> I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are
> more
> screwed up than you think.
>
> I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
>
> I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.
>
> I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're
> finished.
>
> I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty
> things. I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming
> back.I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
>
> I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.
>
> I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are
> celebrities.
>
> I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural
> stupidity.
>
> I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your
> house, one of your kids did it
>
> I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.
>
> I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken
> fromyou too soon and all the less important ones just never go
> away. And the
> real pains in the ass are permanent.


> > Here are some of the top comments made by NBC sports commentators
> > during the [2004] Summer Olympics that they would like to take back

> > 8. Soccer commentator: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like
> > they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
> >
> > 9. Tennis commentator: "One of the reasons Andy is playing so well
> > is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and
> > kisses them . . . Oh my God, what have I just said?!"

hehe. :D
ill tell you all about my weekend tomorrow, just got shopping stuff to do!

paubos na ang 13th month pay ko AT wala pa akong regalo sa mga tao. nice.
but!
i have not one, but TWO credit cards from citibank! aint that nice? jeez, parang sinasabi sakin, sige na... umutang ka na. hahaha!
i got thru that interview ung sa Platinum Plans, if ever i go thru with it, they're offering me not the part time online searcher job BUT the managerial position! asteeegggg... haha wala lang astig lang, as if tanggapin ko... unless 25thou ang offer :D
with bonuses dapat shempre! kung wala, dito na lang ako no, di pa ko harassed, mag-aaral pa ko for free.
im eating carbonara ryt nowwww... feeling ko, naubos sa luxurious eating ko ung 13th month pay ko...
that and buying bags and shoes haha. btw, got the ballet shoes thru air21 today!!! wheee... un nga lang its not the purple shade na i wanted. huhu, pro ok lang cute pa den.
tmrw na ang pre-centennial!!! so excited!!!
im excited for next week also!
oh nooooo!!!
i realized just now, xmas party na namen next week! and morning pa lang ill be preparing na... that means i cant go to escopa to treat the kids to a nice pre-xmas celebrations?! noooo....
pero i want.
humph. the office xmas party can wait. :D
i miss my escopa kids... i miss going to area period... sigh. kumikita nga ako, dumadami naman gastos ko, di pa ganoon kasaya... mas gusto ko nung college... :(

ate at taco bell pala yesterday! wala lang... masaraaaaaaaapppp!!! :D nagugutom tuloy ako... gusto ko ng beef burrito...

jolog songs keep you young

being jologs even, in general...
that is my theory...
when we were young wala pa tayong concepts of baduy or squatter. umiindak lang tayo sa tunog at ginagaya ang mga sinasayaw ng mga artista sa TV. hehe.
kababawan lang naman talga minsan ang pagiging jologs e. diba yan ang parang opposite ng pagiging "cultured"? yung na-aappreciate mo ang mga pelikula ni juday, ang mga kanta ni lito camo, ang mga pakulo sa eat bulaga...
i will be forever jologs. that is my vow. :D bwahahaha.

anyway, i am sooo excited for the pre-centennial this saturday! bonding with old friends...
and for our office xmas party the next saturday! bonding with new friends...

im in charge of decorations and for finding music for our group presentation sa xmas party hehe. shempre jologs tayo. :D

my life is in full swing!
my love life isnt so bad also. hahahaha. :D
all's well if you just let it beeeee...

ive been smiling the entire day

in chronological order:

1. it's not a bad-hair day.
2. ate McDo Sausage McMuffin meal for breakfast.
3. He's wearing THE ring...
4. walking in Ortigas, HHWWPSSP.
5. eating sinigang for lunch, with my fellow starbuzzers.
6. filing for leave tomorrow so we can go to Divisoria!!! (pero wag gagastos... huwaggg!!! er... on 2nd thought... wag mashado. :D)
7. finishing this big UK Company for Exec. Compensation. sheessshhh... 1 more to go!!!
8. finally ordering those cutey pink ballet flats.
9. planning for our Christmas party at the office! Im entitled to a room at the New World Hotel because of that! Hurray!!!
10. emailing alumni peeps for pre-centennial... am excited!!!
11. my sister's makukulit kwentos...
12. i have decided to be Alwina... and i will buy my wings tomorrow.
13. chatting with old friends :D as well as new ones. :D
14. oh and getting my credit card!!! hahaha. good thing ba un?! basta, i swear to be responsible and i swear to not use it on impulse purchases!!! im just happy na the bank identifies me to be a person of good financial standing hehe.

sana more good things tomorrow!!!

my wish list

- a really cute, furry, soft stuffed animal!!! a big one! hehe. i visited toy kingdom the other day and i really fell in love with them! me want huggie huggie stuffie toy! ideally, it's either this cutey doggie or Sully from Montser's Inc.!
- digicam!!! picture picture picture!!! o kaya SAP Voyager!!!
- all paid up dance classes! para all i have to do i show up and groove! :D
- cute cross trainers. to go with my new jeans.
- comfy slip-ons. again to go with my new jeans...
- sling bag. preferebly a pink and orange flowery one... huhu, didnt find the one like Coney's :(
- a new PC. basta the specs are ideal for playing SIMS2!
- SIMS 2 na orig!
- a new blog design na haneeepppp...
- an overnyt hotel stay, complete with massage sessions
- a great book to read
- a funny movie to watch
- cool CD to listen to
- get together with friends... chika, tsismis, kwento...
- an engagement ring... bwahahaha!!! kidding!!!
- i also accept cash, by the way :D
- oh, and world peace... :D seriously, sana nobody gets hungry on christmas day.

dadagdagan ko pa to soon :D

o-u-c-h

I pour my heart out, and in the end, all I get are some randomly generated words of consolation. I guess I really am not of value, then. That would've been fine and dandy, if you actually were honest enough to tell me so. But no, you and your effing mind games, effing emotional games, all conspire to give me the constant illusion that I actually mean something to you.

But I realize it now.

I'm nothing to you. I'm just this little tool to you that you can pick up when you find it novel and cute, then quickly discard when the novelty is worn out.

I'm nothing to you. All this talk about us being close, all this talk about us sharing a special kind of friendship, are nothing but lies you perpetuate just so I'd stay by your side.

I'm nothing to you. What happens in my life does not interest you one iota as much as the chance for me to hear your stories again that you so love hearing yourself tell interest you. My insignificant existence is little more than a source of amusement for you.

I'm nothing to you. I can't get under your skin no matter how I try, nor can I ever be the cause to brighten up your day, either. I simply don't rate enough to somehow be able to affect you.

And yet here I still am, fool that I am, here for you.

Do you even care?

I didn't think so, either.

---from Marcelle's blog---

LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATER:	the incredibles
WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW:	11 minutes - paolo coehlo & Thank God He's Boss - Bo Sanchez
FAVORITE BOARD GAME:	Cranium!!!
FAVORITE MAGAZINE:	Cosmopolitan, Seventeen
FAVORITE SMELLS:	baby na bagong paligo, oranges, cucumber melon, hunky guy smell nyahaha
COMFORT FOOD:	tuna, burger and fries, cheesedog, ice cream
FAVORITE SOUNDS:	laughter, lalo na ung sa babies at mga kakaibang tawa na marinig mo lang matatawa ka na...
WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD:	being all alone. regret. guilt.
WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING:	gusto ko pa matulog...
FAVORITE FAST FOOD PLACE:	mcdo... but looking for a new favorite...
FUTURE CHILD'S NAME:	depends on who im marrying. :D basta merge names namen hehe
FINISH THIS STATEMENT: "IF I HAD A LOT OF MONEY, I WOULD":	not be answering this survey... id be out shopping or feeding the hungry...
DO YOU DRIVE FAST:	i dont drive at all... :(
DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL:	when im super depressed, yeah.
STORMS -- COOL OR SCARY:	scary
WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR:	huhuhu
FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK:	ginpom, red wine, tequila, bubblegum flavored lambanog
FINISH THIS STATEMENT,'IF I HAD THE TIME, I WOULD LOVE TO':	explore... whether im just walking, or biking, or whatever... i want to explore...
DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI:	yes
IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE:	pink!
GLASS HALF-EMPTY OR FULL:	full!
HOW MANY CITIES/TOWNS HAVE YOU LIVED IN:	4
FAVORITE PLACE TO RELAX:	in my bed... cuddling with... my pillowwwww!!!
FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH:	gymnastics ahehe
WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED:	ermm.. kalat. madaming kalat.
TOILET PAPER/ PAPER TOWEL--OVER OR UNDER:	wha?
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!