the moment i wake up...

today i had one of the most horrifying moments of my life. Im just glad it's over. And i realized several things.
1) I am not good when I am faced with the possibility of someone dying. Sure, I am calm, but that's it. I am calm and not doing anything else. That might've been shock. And no matter how many times i've read "what you should do in an emergency", my mind went blank and all i can think of was, well, blank. Not good. Hopefully, I can be better at it next time... Oh God, may there not be a next time!
2) My mom is good in these situations. And i am proud of her because of that. She knew how to take charge and she knew what to do, even if she doesn't REALLY know. She has these great instincts i wish i had.
3) I'm glad my sister wasn't there. She would've been traumatized. And she would've seen her sister being lousy at panicky times.
4) God listens to our prayers. He really does.
5) Life is too precious to waste.
Until now, i haven't been able to do anything yet. I still feel like my heart is beating a lot faster than it normally does. My hands are still shaking a bit.
It's my boss' birthday and i hope we get ice cream. To soothe my nerves...